'There is help out there': Maritimers open up amidst World Suicide Prevention Day

As World Suicide Prevention Day comes and goes, families and friends are remembering their loved ones, wishing they had one more day to spend with them.

At the Nova Scotia Legislature in Halifax on Tuesday, Nova Scotia Moms for Compassionate, Collaborative Mental Health Care, came together to talk about the worst days of their lives and ask for change in the province.

“I want to introduce you to my daughter, Aidaen. She’s here in front of me. She taught me that suicide isn’t always immediate or intentional,” said Kelly Mitchell.

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Mitchell says her family spent four years pleading for help before it was too late for Aidaen. She was just 14-years-old.

“She started with self harm as early as Grade 5. Progressed to wanting to die by Grade 7. Then onto prescription medication, she saw how happy my anti-depressions made me and she wanted to feel that happy. Multiple overdoses over the next two years. Her final overdose, Feb. 21, 2019.”

Unfortunately, Kelly’s story is one that other mothers, families and friends know all too well.

The group of mothers want health-care providers to have more freedom to engage with families and caregivers as partners when it comes to their loved ones mental illness.

“My son was 29-years old when he took his own life. He was a very compassionate, beautiful person who loved deeply,” shared Nancy Saunders.

“I tried a few times to get information from our health-care system and tried to provide information to our health-care system that would have helped Ben before he escalated to the crisis that he did and I had barriers to that,” she added.

The group was asking Premier Tim Houston to meet with them and listen to the moms that have lived experience and ultimately consider changing the current legislation.

“This problem is country wide, but all other provinces have amended or not adopted the legislation and in Ontario, we dropped the word imminent because of the confusion and harm that it was doing,” said Clinical Psychiatrist, Dr. Richard O’Reilly.

“And it was not with respect to sharing information, but with respect to involuntary hospitalization and that was almost 25-years-ago. Nova Scotia needs to act and listen to it sensible and knowledgeable citizens.”

In 2003, World Prevention Suicide Day was created. Twenty-one years later, it’s still just as relevant today.

“For every one person that dies from suicide, there are 10 people who are deeply impacted by the suicide and another 120 people who are impacted,” said Heather Spidell with Nova Scotia Moms for Compassionate, Collaborative Mental Health.

“I think it’s important to discuss it and bring it up every day. There’s a long-time belief that talking about suicide or suicidal ideation can actually cause people to think about it and consider it and in fact that’s actually not true,” she added.

Statistics show that in Canada, suicide rates are approximately three times higher among men compared to women, but it’s something that touches all demographics.

“I attempted suicide twice and I found it very hard, because I’m a veteran first of all. I was diagnosed with some stuff. When I got out, I found it very hard as a male to ask for help,” said Stan MacNeil, who is now a volunteer with the Albert-Westmorland Suicide Prevention Committee.

Events, conferences and gatherings took place across the Maritimes Tuesday to mark day and start a conversation.

In Moncton, N.B., the Albert-Westmorland Suicide Prevention Committee hosted an event at Riverfront Park from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m.

It included live music from Phil Black, EchoSeven and McKayla Daigle, a free BBQ that was sponsored by Mrs. Dunster’s, Rinzlers, Codiac Café, Old Time Meat Market in Riverview, McDonalds on West Main and a cake that was donated by the co-op and the opportunity for people to come together.

“We do these type of events? So we can show people that the old ways of looking at life, where men keep their feelings locked away, they hide in a corner, don’t let anyone see them cry, stuff like that, and it helps change the stigma,” said MacNeil.

“If one person out there can hear this and realize there is someone out there that they’re listening, then maybe other families won’t have to go through what others have gone through in the last few years, losing somebody right?”

MacNeil says he received help by asking the right person and if he can provide that opportunity to someone else and help by sharing his story, that’s what he plans to do.

“I realized by volunteering and helping, it was helping me. So the more I help others, the more in return it helps me. So, I went from being almost at rock bottom to climbing the stairs,” he said.

“There is help out there. I know a lot of people are struggling. There is help. It may not seem like it and that’s what I found when I was going through my struggles was it didn’t seem like there was anybody out there to help me, but then all of a sudden, the doors opened and the help was coming.”

MacNeil says people can reach out to him directly by contacting the Albert-Westmorland Suicide Prevention Committee Facebook page and either ask for him or speak to anyone else who’s a part of the group.

People can also reach out to the Canada Suicide Prevention Helpline at 1-833-456-4566, the Kids Help Phone at 1-800-668-6868 or call 911 or go to the nearest hospital if you require immediate assistance.